Where Are You Anchored?
Without much thought, without much contemplation
I took my anchor out of God and then
Somehow without much thought or even knowing
I placed it in a person- not in God
But anchors placed in people, things, or money,
Or hobbies, work, professions, ministries
Those anchors are not steadfast, they’re unstable
And soon you will be drifting in the storm
And so it happened with me-heart got broken
I could not understand what happened then
I almost drowned in troubled sea and storm
Until I had admitted my mistake
And I told God I’m sorry- I was wrong
Somehow I got distracted in my life
No longer was I seeing God Almighty
As Someone who all answers has in life
Lord, I confess that I was wrong, I wavered
I did not see You as my Refugee, Rock
I got too proud, Your gifts I made my anchor
Instead of anchoring myself in God
I took my anchor out of things and people
And placed it back in God and in His Word
No longer shaken, beaten by the storm
I now have confidence in God alone!!
3/4/2023
Y. Gorelova
I wrote this poem this year, but it’s especially a summery of my last year’s struggles. Only this year did my eyes get opened, that about half of the problems that I faced last year were the result of not being truly anchored in God.
“But what things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ.
8 Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ,
9 And be found in Him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith:
10 That I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being made conformable unto His death” Philippians 3:7-10 KJV
“Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,
2 Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God” Hebrews 12:1-2 KJV
Posted inUncategorized|Comments Off on Where Are You Anchored?
Have you been hurt deeply? Did you know that God loves you so much that He does not want you to carry the pain you are carrying! You do not have to “manage” your pain or hide it. You can truly have that area of your heart healed completely! God has provided for your healing and you can receive that healing!
Today I want to especially thank God for healing so much of my “hidden pain”!
I never knew how simple it was for God to heal the deep pain we are often carrying if we just give it to Him and allow Him to heal those broken areas of our lives. It’s simple for God to heal and fill us with His love- but it can be very difficult for us to “expose” the areas that need healing- and bring them to light.
I am so thankful for the book, Experiencing the Father’s Embrace by Jack Frost, through which my eyes were opened to so many critical areas of my life that needed healing. I remember reading this book and realizing, “Oh, that’s why I am so insecure in {this area or that}, or why I act like {this or that}”.
Many people spend so much money trying to get rid of or manage the pain in their life. The hurt, the disappointments, the trauma, and the mental agony- can cause pain inside of you. You do not have to manage it; you can give it to Jesus! You can be free from it! There is HOPE!!
I do not claim I have all the answers, but I can share how some of the deepest pains in my soul were totally healed! It truly is possible not to carry that pain anymore!
The Simple Process of Receiving Healing for the Soul from God
The process of healing can be simple or difficult, but is so much worth it! Here are the simple steps to take:
Recognize the area where healing is needed. It can be any pain you experienced as a child or adult, or any area where you where hurt or need to forgive. If something or someone just came to your mind- this is probably an area where you need healing.
I have realized that almost every time I had forgiven a person- even if I had forgiven that person a long time ago, there is still “something” that needed healing in my heart from the hurt that person inflicted. That “something” was making me insecure in the area where healing was needed. When I received healing- I felt whole again in that area and was no longer insecure.
Choose to Forgive. Say it out-loud, “I forgive {name the person or situation} for causing this {name the pain} in my life. If you feel like you simply can’t forgive, ask God to help you. He already knows you are struggling to forgive and is more than willing to give you the grace to forgive!
Sincerely say, “Lord, thank You for the grace You give me to forgive. I receive the grace to forgive ___”.
Also, if needed, forgive yourself. Some people carry so much pain because they feel like they can’t forgive themselves for what they have done. Forgiveness is so freeing! If you have asked God to forgive you, He forgave you! And if GOD forgave you, you can forgive yourself!
Forgive Like God Forgave Us
Sometimes to forgive the way God for Christ’s sake has forgiven us is a process. Over and over again God had to lovingly remind me “Forgive like God forgave”.
Imagine coming to God to ask Him for forgiveness of your sin, and He tells you, “I will not forgive you until you realize HOW GREAT, and how utterly vile your sin is. You have NO IDEA what your sin did to Jesus. Now I first need to show you HOW AWFUL your sin is and only THEN I will forgive you!” The amazing thing about God is that when we simply come to Him and ask Him to forgive us, He forgives you.
God does not shove our sin into our face. Yet, we often want to shove someone else’s sin or mistakes into their face. We want to explain how totally awful their mistake is. And only then we think we can finally forgive. Yes, sometimes we need to lovingly show the offender where they have wronged us. But we need to do this with the right heart, the heart that has forgiven.
We often want to forgive but place a wall between us. Forgive but say, “I forgive, but I will never have a good relationship with you”. Or “I forgive, but I am going to stay away from you”. Imagine if God spoke to us like this! Now of course in certain situations, because that person chooses to stay evil/abusive/dangerous you might have to leave that person/situation. Sometimes distance is needed in certain situations.
The reality is that we often want to “forgive but stay away” from the person who hurt us, even if that person is not abusive/dangerous/evil. When we sin against God over and over again, and then ask for forgiveness, He does not tell us, “I forgive you, but stay away from me”.
Unfortunately there are also people on this earth who simply don’t care that they have hurt you. Or they are glad that they hurt you. They might think you deserved to be hurt. If you wait for those people to ask you for forgiveness, it might never happen. Forgive not because they need forgiveness, but because you need to live in freedom and you do not need to carry that pain.
Give the Pain to God and Let Him Heal that area of your soul. This is a crucial step that most people don’t know about even if they know the importance of forgiveness. There is healing we receive simply by forgiveness, but forgiveness does not always mean that the pain that that person/situation inflicted is aromatically healed.
This is the step I wished I knew much earlier in life! Everyone says, “Forgive, Forgive”, but thousands of people on this earth have already forgiven a long time ago and yet they still live with the pain that is not yet healed. Forgiving someone does not take the pain away. Not every pain heals with time. It was when I was reading the book Experiencing the Father’s Embrace that I first realized the importance of giving the pain to Jesus that that person/situation inflicted.
This very crucial process might seem challenging to some, but if you read on, I believe you will understand how to give up your pain to Jesus, and allow Him to heal you!
The part of you that hurt so deep many call “the heart”. The soul and the heart are usually used interchangeably by many. Your body might be totally OK, but now your soul needs healing. Below, I will explain how or why healing for your soul is actually possible.
What God did for me, He CAN do for you!! God is not respecter of persons, and there is no partiality in God (Romans 2:11). In other words, what is available from God for one person is available for you also- you just need to believe and receive.
Jesus Purchased Salvation for Our Entire Redemption
Jesus did not only die to save us from our sins (Matthew 1:21). Jesus came here to also destroy the works of the devil (1 John 3:8). Jesus came to redeem our entire being. Someone simplified it this way:
To redeem our soul, in Gethsemane, Jesus sweated drops of blood as His soul was exceedingly sorrowful and in agony (Matt 26:38, Luke 22:44).
To redeem our body, Jesus allowed His back to be whipped. And by His “stripes you were healed” (1 Peter 2:24)
To redeem our spirit, Jesus was hung on the cross, so that we could be eternally redeemed. He paid for our sins and redeemed us on the cross.
Jesus could have only went to the cross to purchase the redemption of our spirit and only suffer there so that our spirits can be with Him eternally. But He chose to sweat drops of blood in agony to redeem the soul also. And He chose to take the stripes before going to the cross to redeem our bodies and purchase healing for them. This is how much He loves us!!!
For the purpose of this blog, I will focus only on the redemption of the soul. Our souls includes our feelings, our emotions, and our mindset.
Salvation for the Soul
Is your soul in agony from the pain someone else caused? Are you exceedingly sorrowful? Do you know that you do not have to carry the pain you are suffering because Jesus already paid for your sorrow and the agony of your soul also! Read the following verses carefully:
Jesus said “My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death” (Matthew 26:38). In Luke 22:44 it says “And being in an agony He prayed more earnestly: and His sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground”.
Jesus’s soul was exceedingly sorrowful, even unto death, so yours doesn’t have to be! He experienced agony of the soul so that you don’t have to be in agony!
If you are questioning now, “But how do I receive healing for my soul?” In a very similar same way you can receive salvation of your spirit, repent (turn back) and believe! Place your faith in the finished work of Jesus Christ! To be saved spiritually, a person needs to repent, turn away from their sin, and believe in Christ alone and the one and only Savior; Jesus in the only Savior because He was the only one who paid for our salvation! No one else shed his blood to wipe away your sins.
Another way to say this is: to be saved spiritually, you needed to Ask Jesus to forgive you from all your sins; give Jesus all your sins. By faith, receive forgiveness and salvation by trusting that He will do what He said He will do! Any one who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved!
How To Receive Healing for Your Soul
To receive healing for the soul we also need to repent- turn away from holding on to unforgiveness or bitterness or hatred for the person. Let go of unforgiveness and forgive. We also need to believe- believe that Jesus truly can take the pain away and heal our hearts.
A practical example of how to receive healing for your soul/ healing of your inner pain is to do the following by faith:
First, remember you need to forgive yourself/another person/situation or the reason why you have this pain. Tell God you forgive ____. Then simply say something like this to God by faith: “I give you this pain. I don’t want to carry it any more. Please take it from me. Heal my heart. Fill the area of my soul/heart where this pain was with Your Love, Your peace. I receive Your love, Your life, Your joy, Your Peace”.
What “is taken out from our soul”- like unforgiveness/pain, needs to be replaced with something. Many people “take out unforgiveness” from the soul and forgive, but are still empty and are still in pain. You can also give the pain to Jesus, but that area of your soul where the pain was attached can be left empty. This is why when you give up the pain you were carrying to Jesus, it is always a good idea to ask God for fill that area with His love, His life, His joy, and His Peace. When God fills that area of your soul with His love… healing takes place!
Now remember, this can be easy if the pain is light and was not that deep, or this can be extremely difficult- if you are dealing with very deep pain. Because to give your pain to God, you first need to admit it’s there and expose it and give it up.
It is often much easier for us to hide the pain and carry it rather then expose it and risk feeling again how deeply it hurt. But if we do not give the pain up- we cannot receive healing. Why carry the pain for the rest of your life if you can receive total healing from it!
My Story of How I Gave My Hidden Pain to Jesus
I remember the very first time that I realized I needed to give my pain to Jesus- after reading a particular chapter in Experiencing the Father’s Embrace book. I became restless and anxious just at the thought of needing to deal with my deep, very well hidden, pain. It tried to avoid the process and wasted a lot of hours scrolling on the Internet.
I simply knew that if I wanted to heal, and grow, I needed to deal with the pain I was hiding. Later I finally got the courage to do this, to expose the pain and to face it… Only God know how much I cried exposing that pain and letting go of it, and how much I wanted to scream in the process because it hurt so deep. I could barely form the words, “I… give… You… this pain… Jesus please take it all… away… And fill that part that hurts with… Your… love”. But then came the sweet healing from Jesus, and trust me it’s 1000 times better then carrying the pain, ignoring it, or hiding it! Jesus truly did heal that broken part of me!
So much freedom came just by simply giving my pain to Jesus!! So much confidence!
Now, I would definitely say that it would have been much better if I did this process with a Spirit-filled friend who could be there to support and pray for me and with me. I was alone with God in this process, too afraid to let anyone in where it hurt the most. For the longest time, I was the person who shied away from hugs, but I admit, it would have been nice to have someone hold me in this process.
And of course just because I dealt with the hidden pain in one area does not mean I never had to deal with pain again. The more we deal with people, the more we can get hurt. Or situations in life we see can hurt us. I would have to say I have had to give the pain I felt over a situation or people to God many times again and again. But it was very simple and definitely not that dramatic as the first time. It was a simple, “Lord I give you this pain I feel over ____. Please take the pain and fill me with Your love”. And instantly I was over that pain and walked in freedom again!
When we see pain and suffering in the world it does not mean that we need to carry all that pain on our shoulders.
If that pain touched your soul- learn to give it to God right away! It is so much more freeing to give the pain to God right away. Don’t carry what He paid for and what He doesn’t want you to carry.
I have to admit, there have been recent times when I did carry the pain for awhile. I was too stubborn to admit that part of the reason that I experienced such deep pain was because I did not hold every thought captive to the obedience of Christ like we should (2 Corinthians 10:5). I had expectations of someone and when those expectations were not met, I got hurt.
The thing is that we can’t hide from God the way we feel. If we are questioning Him or blaming Him- He already knows! And He still loves us! God is not afraid of our doubting. He does not feel insecure just because we are struggling and feel insecure. So the best thing is to admit your emotions or doubts to God.
When I finally repented and admitted to God that I got hurt by someone “this deeply” because I did not hold every thought captive to the obedience of Christ and asked Him to forgive me, I received so much healing from the pain in that situation. And when I finally admitted to God my doubts and how in my mind I felt He failed me in that situation- though God is faithful and NEVER Fails!! But at that moment I was having doubts, and when I finally admitted them to God, and asked for forgiveness, it’s amazing how fast my heart started to heal!
The Importance of Truly Giving Up the Pain
Recently, I was also in a situation when I couldn’t understand, why in all the previous times, when I asked God to take my pain away, it seemed to happen instantly, and I received healing and instant peace. But in this particular situation it just seemed that my heart was just still aching so much and hurt very deeply. Then I realized that it was because I kept telling God “Take this pain away”, but I was refusing to give that pain up. For Him to take the pain away, we first need to let go of the pain. Give it up. Stop holding on to it. Expose it and give it up. When I finally gave it up, and asked Him to fill that wounded part of me with His love, the process of healing started immediately and my heart stopped aching.
I learned that we cannot just tell God to take the pain away. We first need to forgive and then give the pain up.Give the pain to Jesus. And then ask Him to fill that area of your soul with His life, His love, His healing.
Healing Can Be Instant, Healing Can Be a Process
Yes, we can receive instant healing over certain situations, but sometimes it’s a process, and that’s OK too. Thank God that that process started!!! There have been many situations for which I have received healing instantly, and some are still a process. Sometimes we get reminded of the pain, and if we let our mind dwell on the pain someone inflicted us, we might get another wound and have to repeat the process of healing: Forgive, give the pain to Jesus, and allow Him to heal that area again.
Believe and Declare God’s Word Over Yourself
If you have given your pain to Jesus already and you still feel like you have a lot of pain and you are still hurting, start declaring Scripture over your self that is relevant to your situation. For instance, Psalm 147:3 NKJV says,
“He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds”
You can receive what is written in this verse by saying out-loud, “Thank You Lord that you heal my broken-heart and you bind up my wounds”. Yes, God hears us even when our mouths don’t open. Speaking out-loud is for us because our soul needs to hear “GOD HEALS THE BROKENHEARTED AND BINDS UP THEIR WOUNDS!”
We must all learn to place our faith not in our feelings that still tell us that we are hurting, but in the Word of God. I found it truly amazing how fast the process of healing was completed when I believed the Word- that God heals the brokenhearted and binds up our wounds.
Another important passage from the Word of God is:
“The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake.” Psalm 23:1-3
You can start declaring all of Psalm 23 it over your life, and especially thanking God that He restores your soul! He truly does restores our soul!
Declare Scripture over yourself out-loud until you truly believe what it says and experience its power!
Healing of the Soul Gives us Confidence (among many other things!)
When I went to Ukraine for 2 month during summer as a volunteer, I often told people there, “About a year ago, I would not have went here even with no war. I was too shy to travel alone. But God did such a work in my life and changed me so much that I came here… And I have so much peace being here.”
People in Ukraine were often very surprised and deeply touched to meet “foreigners like me” who came to their country to help out.
The reality was that it was because my soul had received so much healing in different “pain” areas that I was able to have the confidence to obey God and go to Ukraine during war-time. I had shared some areas of pain here and another area of healing is found in this blog post, Receiving Healing from Pain: https://imustdecrease.net/receiving-healing-from-pain/
God has healed me from so much pain in the soul. Now, I usually try to give the pain to Jesus right away that I see or experience or that is inflicted upon my soul. Exposing areas of our heart where we hurt or where pain has been inflicted on us and giving the pain to Jesus has truly been so freeing to me. The times that I fell back into the “trap of self-pity and hurt” where times when I did not expose the pain to God and did not give it to Him right away. But when I did- healing was mine. Peace was mine. And life is so much easier to live when your heart is healed.
Steps to Receive Healing for the Soul
In Summery, the steps to receive Healing for your deep hidden pain, or healing for the soul are these:
Recognize the area where healing is needed
Choose to Forgive
Give the Pain to Godand Let Him Heal that area of your soul
Believe and Declare God’s Word Over Yourself
Soon, I am planning on sharing another step that is sometimes necessary for us to receive more healing.
All of these steps are very possible, because Jesus made this possible! Jesus already PAID so that your soul will be healed!! He experienced extreme agony of the soul and exceeding sorrow so you will not have to. Why carry the pain Jesus already PAID FOR!! You don’t have to hide it or carry it all your life. Learn to give the pain to Jesus right away and let Him fill you with His love.
It is time especially for believers to receive healing for our souls. The world is full of broken people, who need us to shine our light bright. But if we are still hiding because we are paralyzed with insecurity and sadness and all other negative emotions, then our light will not shine as brightly. Our soul needs healing.
I would like to end this post with this poem that I had written after I read the book, Experiencing the Father’s Embrace, by Jack Frost”. Actually, originally I was planning on just posting this poem and just writing a little note on how God healed my Hidden pain… but then I ended up writing this whole article because I really felt like people needed to know how to receive healing for their souls from God.
Let God Heal Your Hidden Pain
We bury our pain deep inside
Put on a face of toughness and move on
And we pretend the pain it is not there
But pain unhealed is like a heavy burden
But then one day the pain gets uncovered
And we it see- and oh it hurts so deep
The pain of lack of love, lack of affection
The pain of child- who desperately wants love
The pain of rejection and avoidance
The pain of hurtful words, lack of attention
The pain of not knowing what to do
When you’re not loved they way you needed it
But can we blame our parents and point fingers
Because they failed to love, affection give?
Maybe they too it lacked, they too it wanted
And did their best with little they received
They gave and gave- they gave what they had
They were not taught affection is important
They too it lacked, society is tough
They too their pain buried deep inside
Or maybe they abusive became, hostile
Turned to addictions to their pain just soothe
And maybe from their pain- you pain received
And drank the cup of sorrow that they gave
************************************************
What do we do- with wounds that are so deep?
What do we do with pain that we received?
Forgive, forgive- forgiveness freedom gives
And opens door for healing and redemption
What do we do, if we forgave, but still
The pain is there, the wound has not yet healed?
Don’t bury it and do not it ignore
Give it to Jesus; all pain give to God
Father of Mercies God is still today
And great compassion for you He does have
He’s God of consolation and all comfort
To Him come as a child in need of love
Tell Him your pain and that you comfort need
Let Him you nurture and affection give
Give pain to Him and let Him your wounds heal
Let Him you comfort, console you and heal
God is the God of love, He is still love
If you lack love, He wants you to it have
He loves you greatly, He compassion has
He pours His love so lavishly, so freely
Yes you can cry, and you can cry deep tears
But let Him comfort you, don’t run from Him
Do not ignore the pain- give it to Him
And let Him heal your wounds so deep within
1/1/2022
Y. Gorelova
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God” 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 NKJV
Today I am especially thankful for God’s love and the hope that God gives us! I am also thankful for giving me so many friends that love and care for me. Friends that I can pray with and share my heart with.
“And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us” Romans 5:5
The Word of God tells the believer that God already GAVE us the love of God! It is shed aboard in our hearts by the Holy Spirit whom He gave us! That means through the empowering of the Holy Spirit, we can love!
God loves us so much, and I want His love to flow from me everyday to other people in my life.
I wrote this poem awhile ago and wanted to share it:
To Love Like God
In this world of selfish pride, ambitions
In this world where people seek their own
Help me Lord to love You, seek You always
Help me Lord to other people love
In this world where loneliness is rampant
In this world where so much stuff we have
Help me Lord to love another person
Help me others love and care for them
As I look at self and my ambitions
I now see, so little I have loved
I have too self-centered been so often
I confess I others loved not much
Just like Christ has loved me, has forgave me
Just like Christ- I also want to love
Lord in my own power I cannot do this
Help me Lord love others, love them much
Help me not look down on other people
And to never anyone despise
Help me Lord to love and to love deeply
Help me Lord I cannot on my own
In this world of Internet and cellphones
That just pull us in and time we waste
Help me put aside things that distract me
And to love You more, love others more
For Your great love I just want to thank You
Thank You for the way You proved Your love
Thank You Holy Spirit for the power
To forgive and love like Jesus loved
Y. Gorelova
4/11/2019
“A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another”
How can we be thankful -if this was the worse year of our life so far?
2020 and 2021 were probably the best years of my life. 2022- has been the most difficult, challenging year of my life- starting in January. The difficulties and the pain I experienced this year- I have never experienced before. I did not know what it meant to hurt this deeply until this year.
As challenging as it was to go to Ukraine for 2 months during summer- they were truly my best months! It was a time of oasis from the personal problems I faced in U.S.
Maybe they were the best for me because focusing on helping people and bringing hope to difficult situations can help us keep our thoughts off our problems. Maybe they were the best because so many people were praying for me and I just had this supernatural grace and peace to be in Ukraine. I am so thankful for that!
I was often amazed in Ukraine how many people were still so thankful. It was usually the elderly who where especially thankful. Thankful for each day they woke up alive, thankful for family, for food… I found it amazing that people can truly be so thankful even though they are struggling and it seems all around them, the world is falling apart.
This year has truly been extremely difficult for me. November is a time when so many of us try to be thankful. And I too I would like to especially focus of being thankful!
Difficult times are not the times to focus on our problems and have a pity party for ourselves.
Difficult seasons are the times of our life when we especially need to remember God’s grace and benefits and all the good things we have been through and seen in our life.
So this month of November, I would like to share some of the blessings and miracles I have experienced in my life, and just different things I am thankful for.
I truly hope you will join me in this journey- of being thankful- and seeing the good- no matter the circumstances!!
When All Your Hopes Just Crush Before You
When all your hopes just crush before you
When dreams just walk away from you
When you are faced with great deep sorrow
Do you complain- or say a thank you?
To still be thankful, say a thank you
Even in midst of sorrow, pain
To still acknowledge God and praise Him
What better way to look at life?
Maybe in life- you have great hardships
But in those hardships- God changed not
He’s still the same, today, forever
He is still faithful and He’s good!
Maybe in life- in midst of problems
God became small, small in your mind
Because you turned your eyes on problems
Instead of seeing His great might
He is still King, He is Almighty
He’s the Deliverer and Friend
He is our Father who’s in Heaven
And He still loves and cares, my friend
11/1/2022
Y. Gorelova
“Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever” Hebrews 13:8
As I approached the hospital receptionist in Kiev, Ukraine- in late July of 2022, she started to angrily yell at me: “I TOLD YOU TO GET OUT OF HERE! YOU CANNOT GO INSIDE!…” She then threatened to call security if I did not exit immediately.
Trying to keep back the tears, I went back to the church across the street where I was lodging at with my friends.
Earlier that day, I strongly felt like I needed to go to that hospital and pray for patients. I was also led to read Revelation 3:7-8 NKJV:
“And to the angel of the church in Philadelphia write, ‘These things says He who is holy, He who is true, “HE WHO HAS THE KEY OF DAVID, HE WHO OPENS AND NO ONE SHUTS, AND SHUTS AND NO ONE OPENS”:
“I know your works. See, I have set before you an open door, and no one can shut it; for you have a little strength, have kept My word, and have not denied My name”
“See, I have set before you an open door, and no one can shut it”- those words seemed to jump out of my Bible. I simply knew, God will open a door for me to go to a hospital, if not this hospital, then another one. But this attempt was a complete disappointment.
Ministries in Ukraine
I had the privilege of being part of many different non-medical ministry opportunities in Ukraine. But one of the my biggest desires in Ukraine was to go to hospitals and pray for patients and share about God’s love for them. Hospitals was one of my passions- after all, I had worked as a Critical Care Nurse for almost 10 years.
But getting into hospitals in Ukraine proved to be more difficult than I imagined. “War time hospital security” makes it difficult even for volunteers to go in.
But the doors that God opens- nobody can close!!! And I experienced such blessing!
Another Attempt to Visit that Hospital
Few weeks after that negative experience, I was again with the House of Hope organization. I was with the House of Hope team the majority of my time in Ukraine and if you would like to check this organization out or donate to them, please visit https://houseofhope.ngo/en/donate. This is a German based, very trustworthy organization, that has been helping in Ukraine since the beginning of war in Ukraine.
At first, I was hesitant to go to that hospital again. This time there was another nurse and a paramedic who where also part of the House of Hope team, and we decided to try to go there to minister.
After the morning prayer with the team, I received peace about going there again.
When the three of us went to that hospital, just like before, the answer was at first “No”. But there was a different receptionist this time, and when I asked again if I can see a nursing administrator in that hospital, that nursing administrator quickly led us to the director of the hospital!
God Opened the Door
There we were, sitting in the office of the director of the hospital! I was amazed how quickly we ended up in his office! The director was very deeply touched that foreigner volunteers came and was very open to us coming and talking to and praying for the patients.
Actually, he wanted us to go to a unit where “end-stage cancer patients were” and patients undergoing palliative care. He told us, “Since people in that unit will leave this side of life soon, you should go to that unit and pray and share with them…”
After leaving some cookies and candies for the nurses and other staff in that unit, we went to see the patients. The staff quickly went to each patient room and told them we were in the unit and asked them for permission for us to visit. Almost every patient agreed. There were only few rooms in that unit where we were not allowed to go and did not go.
I was amazed how God opened the door for us to go into a unit were most patients were given a “death sentence” and was very thankful for the opportunity to minister to them.
The Patients Were Very Appreciative of us Coming
So many patients were so thankful that we came and prayed for them. But more importantly, many heard the good news of the Gospel and how to be reconciled with God.
One elderly patient was so eager to receive forgiveness from God that she told me, “I want this, I want to be reconciled with God, but don’t know how to”. I shared with her… and after she prayed with me, the look of her face changed! Her face was filled with joy, and she smiled as she held her hand over her heart and told us that she feels so much better, and that she is at ease now! She sincerely thanked us for coming.
As we walked from room to room, I could feel and see the tension on the faces of some of the staff. I could tell that many of the staff where not that thrilled about us coming. Judging from the looks some of the staff gave us, and the comments made by them, I am certain that we could have been told to leave the unit before seeing all the patients there. But no one could tell us to leave because the director of the hospital let us in!
Well… the staff lady who brought food to the patients in one of the rooms did kick us out from that room. As we were about to pray for them, she sternly told us to “Leave now and come back when they were done eating!” The patients told her they wanted us there, but she didn’t care and insisted that we leave. We came back to that room again later.
We went from room to room in that unit, visiting every room we were allowed to go into, encouraging patients, praying for them, and preaching the Gospel.
The spiritual needs of the patient are always important- even if the staff do not understand this and even if it is obvious that they did not want us there. I was very grateful for this opportunity to be in that unit, to pray for patients, and to see their face light up or eyes fill with tears as we prayed for them. They were truly grateful that we came.
The Lessons Learned
That day, I learned some important spiritual lessons. Sometimes to hinder us and stop us, the Enemy tries to intimidate us. He might use an angry person’s lips to do that and we might get yelled at. It might look like at first that the door is permanently shut.
The Enemy might try to convince us there is no point in trying again. In His time, God will open the door. We must not allow the Enemy to intimidate us to the point of giving up and not ever trying again just because the door was closed initially.
I realized also that even though my first attempt to visit that hospital was not successful, it was still needed. That first time, I went to at least three different buildings before figuring out where exactly the main hospital entrance was. Maybe my limited understanding of the Ukrainian language played a role in difficulty finding the hospital entrance.
We did not have to waste time looking for the entrance to the hospital building when I went there again.
Lastly, the most important lesson that I learned that day was that when God opens the door, NO ONE can shut it!
In the Image of God You made me
But that image was marred, destroyed
And Christ came to redeem that image
So that I will be made like Him
In the image of God You made me
Not so that I will live for self
Not so that I will do my will
Or waste time doing my own pleasure
In the image of God You made me
That like Christ I will look and act
You are love and I love must radiate
And love You and love others much
In the image of God You made me
You’re longsuffering, patient, kind
You are lowly in heart and meek
And like Christ I must look, like Christ
In the image of God You made me
And myself I deny, my will
And I take up my cross, Christ follow
For Christ lives now His life through me.
4/26/2020
“And He died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for Him who for their sake died and was raised” 2 Corinthians 5:15 ESV
Jesus’s image was marred, distorted, beyond human recognition- so that our distorted image can be redeemed. So that we could look like Jesus.
“For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren” Romans 8:29
“And the LORD passed before him and proclaimed, “The LORD, the LORD God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abounding in goodness and truth” Exodus 34:6 NKJV
Without Christ, the image of God is distorted in us. We are by nature self-centered, proud, selfish, and often judgmental and defensive…
My Dear Child- you have griefs, sorrows
And you questioned My love, care
Have you ever thought, considered
How this world came into being?
It was simple, very simple
There is power in My Words!
I just spoke- the world created!
I just spoke- and made all things!
In My Words- there is life, power!
And the Word it was made flesh
For you see in God’s own timing
I – The Word- became a man
I’m a Person, yes a person
I am God- Almighty, Great
I am love- love took on flesh
And Love walked upon this earth
Love healed others, preached God’s Kingdom
Love was beaten and betrayed
Love rejected was, forsaken
Love for you laid down it’s life
You are loved, by God the Father
And for you He gave His Son
You are loved by Jesus, Savior
He for you His life did give
You are loved by Holy Spirit
He’s the Comforter, the Helper
He will lead us to all truth
And reveal Jesus to us
My dear child, you have Me questioned
And you questioned My care, love
I My love have proved, showed clearly
When for you Jesus bled, died
Jesus died and He was buried
But in three days rose again
The Word died- but it has power
Resurrected in three days
And forever the Word lives still
And the Word has power still
It redeems and saves deliverers
And makes whole and it still heals
But you must not doubt; Believe it
For the Word it changes not
“Come to Me all who are weary
I will give you rest for souls”
Come and see, taste of God’s goodness
Be a doer of God’s Word
God is good and He still loves you
And He never will you fail
9/13/2022
“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The same was in the beginning with God. All things were made by Him; and without Him was not any thing made that was made” John 1:1 -3
“And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us…” John 1:14a
“And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so” Gen 1:11
And God said……… and it was so” Genesis 1
“He sent His word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions” Psalm 107:20
“Come unto Me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” Matthew 11:28
“O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in Him” Psalm 34:8
*Scripture is from the King James Version (KJV), unless otherwise indicated
I come to repent before You
For life that has prayer lacked
For I have neglected often
Fellowship with You to have
The world- it me pulled so often
The phone- to it I was glued
Distracted I was so often
To fellowship have with God
Deceived I myself so often
That I this or that can do
Without You acknowledging always
Many things I have done without You
Self-centered I was so often
And often my will I sought
Communion with God I neglected
Neglected the One I love
I trusted in my own power
Resolve to pray more, You seek
I failed so much and so often
Of my sin I come to repent
***
I thank You for Jesus- Savior
My sin, all of it You forgave!
And You have redeemed and saved me
From all of my sin You saved me
I thank You for You will finish
You’ll finish what You began
Your will is that I’ll conform
Completely to image of Christ
And You gave me also freely
A heart that You loves and seeks
I am now and new creation
I am now a child of God
A spirit of prayer You gave me
So freely, so lovingly
To God I belong completely
For that I You thank and praise
And I now abide in Jesus
Sweet fellowship I now have
You gave me the spirit of prayer
Communion with God I have
4/23/2020
“Being confident of this very thing, that He which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ” Philippians 1:6 KJV
“For whom He did foreknow, He also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren” Romans 8:29 KJV
“I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you shall be clean from all your uncleannesses, and from all your idols I will cleanse you. And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put My Spirit within you, and cause you to walk in My statutes and be careful to obey My rules” Ezekiel 36:25-27 ESV
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation” 2 Corinthians 5:17a NKJV
“Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s” 1 Corinthians 6: 19-20 NKJV
Thank You Lord for beginning a good work in me and thank You that You will FINISH IT!!
Thank You for the work You are doing in me to conform me to the image of Jesus. Please forgive me for every time that I have hindered that work. Take away any desire in me that tries to hinder You from conforming me to the image of Jesus.
Thank You for giving me a new heart. Thank You for placing Your Spirit in me and for empowering me to walk in Your ways. Burn everything out of me that is hindering You, that opposes You, and that doubts You.
Thank You that in Christ, I am a NEW CREATION. Give me a deeper revelation of who I am as a new creation and help me to walk like a new creation and not in my old ways.
I am not my own. Thank You Jesus that You have bought me with a huge price; thank You for giving Yourself for me. Lord help me to glorify You daily with my life.
I was in Ukraine for about a week before I was in an area where I heard bombing and gunfire… I heard bombing during the day at far distance… but for the most part, it was a quiet day and evening.
That evening we went to another city in the east. When I went to bed it was quiet and peaceful; but I woke up a couple of hours after falling asleep because of so much noise.
Gunfire… there was so much gunfire. Constant gunfire.
When I heard gunfire that night for the first time, my heart got so disturbed and fear tried to grip my heart.
It does not say, don’t let your heart be troubled or afraid- unless there is a war- then it is OK for you to allow your heart to be troubled or afraid.
Fear is an enemy that does more damage then circumstances can ever cause. And I did not want to bow beforeit.
Opportunities for Ministry in Ukraine
God has called me to Ukraine for such a time as this.
That day in Ukraine so much happened: ❤️ Our team met with a mayor of a city and other officials, military personnel and local city volunteers and encouraged and prayed for them. I had a few minutes with the mayor and told him of God’s love and gave him a New Testament with Psalms, which he gladly received and promised to read. It came to my heart to also tell him to read Psalm 18th (17th in Ukrainian) that day and he promised he will.
❤️ The mayor provided as a list of few local families we could visit: 🙏 We visited a family with a teenage girl who was a survivor of an explosion that left a metal piece in her hip. We also prayed for her and her family. That family evacuated from that city the next day.
🙏 One of the families we visited had 7 small children, and their father had a disability and had only one leg. The girls of that family were so sweet and gave us hugs as soon as we cane in! We brought them some grains, toilet paper, cabages, and other things and gave out New Testaments, prayed for them, and told them of God’s love. The mother told me they had no plans to evacuate unless it got really bad.
Visiting a local family with 7 children. I’m holding the baby of the family!
🙏 One of the woman in a house we visited told us that that day in their city there was a funeral of a mother who died from an explosion- leaving 2 small children without a mother.
Later on that day we went to another city and stayed at a militаry base.. God opened up on opportunity and empowered me to preach to a group of soilders! We prayed for them, encouraged them, and gave them small gifts which included a pocket New Testament for each soilder!
Sharing the Word with the soilders!
❤️ That day, there were so many Ukranians who thanked us for coming.
Facing Fear
That day was a full day of ministry. I knew I was in Ukraine for a reason.
But that night, when I woke up hearing gunfire, and as fear was trying to grip my heart… thoughts came to my mind, “What are you doing here?… risking your life…”
Do the promises of God fail and become inactive just because there is a war? Absolutely not!!
Every promise of God is YES and AMEN!!
“For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us” 2 Corinthians 1:20 NKJV
But what do you do when you are still scared?
I couldn’t sleep, so I started reading Psalm 91, quitely whispering it.
It’s easy to set our mind on things of earth, the scarry things we hear and experience, but victory comes when we set our mind on things above!
“You shall not be afraid of the terror by night” vs 5a NKJV
“Father“, I prayed, “It says here I will not be afraid at night, and yet right now I am afraid. But I don’t want to fear“.
Gunfire got closer and seemed to be getting more intense. I heard glass breaking. Fear tried to consume me. But that night, the bigger battle was in my mind.
“Lord, I don’t want to be afraid” I told God again.
“You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, Nor of the arrow that flies by day” Psalm 91:5
“Lord, but what if I am still afraid? I know You are my refuge and deliverer. Please help me”.
It seemed like there would be no end to gunfire.
“A thousand may fall at your side, And ten thousand at your right hand; But it shall not come near you” Psalm 91:7
I kept repeating this promise of God and declaring it.
“Is shall not come near me” “It shall not come near me, Lord I don’t want it come near me”.
But the gunfire seemed to get closer and closer. Then I heard an agonizing scream from a woman and more gunfire, more glass breaking.
“It shall not come near me. It shall not come near me. Thank You Lord that it shall not come near me, I don’t want gunfire near me Lord”.
I continued to read Psalm 91
“He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him” vs 15 NKJV
It does not say we will not face trouble or sorrow, but that God will be with us in it. And He will deliver us!!
“With long life I will satisfy him, And show him My salvation” vs 16 NKJV
“Thank You Lord that with long life You will satisfy me” I prayed.
The Battle For Peace
And yet worry, panic, and fear tried to get my attention. The Enemy tried to make me believe a lie: “God’s Word says this… but that is not true, you are still feeling fear…”.
It was dark. The gunfire made it scary. And the Enemy of my soul wanted me to bow to fear and leave the country before my mission was over.
“It shall not come near me, it shall not come near me. Thank You Lord that You will satisfy me with long life” I kept whispering.
And then I thought, “If I die here it is not because the promises of God stopped working, but because I bowed down to fear, so I absolutely need to stand on God’s promises and believe. I cannot allow myself to bow to fear”.
But the gunfire was still disturbing and there seemed no end to it.
“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me” Psalm 23:4 NKJV
To my natural eyes, at that moment, fear and gunfire seemed much closer then God. He was with me. And yet I did not feel like He was. The air in my room was filled with coldness, oppression and gloom. But I chose to believe what God said then what my circumstances told me. So I thanked God that He was with me.
This is in a city we visited few days after I came to Ukraine. It was bombed early in the war. We prayed for people there, and I was able to lead one person to Christ there!
“You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over” Psalm 23:5 NKJV
Thank You Lord for preparing a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
That night the Enemy tried to feed me with worry, fear, and anxiety. But I chose to eat from the table of God’s goodness instead.
I fed on His Word. I fed on His faithfulness. I fed on His love. I fed on His goodness and mercy. I fed on His peace.
“Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever” Psalm 23:6
“Thank You Lord that goodness and mercy follow me all the days of my life” I prayed, “and today is one of the days of my life, so thank You for Your goodness and mercy”.
As a good soilder, endure hardships, I was reminded (2 Timothy 2:3). Endure, do not get discouraged or afraid.
Feed on God’s Word not Fear
Gunfire continued and seemed so close now. But I chose to feed on God’s Word instead of what the Enemy was doing and how he was trying to make me feel.
“Gunfire STOP IN THE NAME OF JESUS! Do NOT COME NEAR ME!” I prayed and with faith declared!
I started reading and declaring many other encouraging verses from the Bible.
And then I was reminded of this verse:
This verse is always on my phone on one of the pages. That night the Lord reminded me to read it, and when I read it faith arose over every fear that tried to consume me!
“And the LORD, He it is that doth go before thee; He will be with thee, He will not fail thee, neither forsake thee: fear not, neither be dismayed” Deuteronomy 31:8KJV
He WILL NOT FAIL ME!! HE ALREADY WENT BEFORE ME TO UKRAINE!! HE IS WITH ME!! HE WILL NOT FAIL ME OR FORSAKE ME!! THERE IS NO NEED TO FEAR OR BE DISMAYED!!!
Truth Always Supercedes Reality and Facts
Facts told me I’m in a country that is at war. Reality told me that my life was in danger. Reality told me it is natural to be afraid of gunfire. Facts told me that many civilians have died in this war and I can too. Reality told me I was in an extremely unsafe area.
And you see reality might be right, but reality is not the final truth!!! Truth always supercedes reality and facts!! And I chose to believe TRUTH over the reality I was facing!
Truth is in God’s Word!!
Truth says that Jesus will never leave me or forsake me! (Matthew 28:20)
Truth says Jesus gave gave me His peace! (John 14:27)
Truth says that God is my deliverer!! (Psalm 18:2-3)
Truth says that God is my refuge and my fortress! (Psalm 91:2)
Truth says God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble! (Psalm 46:1) God is not far but very present when we are in trouble!
Truth says He will not fail me! (Deuteronomy 31:8)
Truth says He will not forsake me! (Deuteronomy 31:8)
Truth says God will be with me! (Deuteronomy 31:8).
Truth says that goodness and mercy follow me! Psalm 23:6
Truth says though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for God is with me! (Psalm 23:4)
God’s Word never fails and He is always faithful!! I stood on God’s Word and Fed on His faithfulness and the Word instead of fear and gunfire.
Before the gunfire died down and I no longer heard it, God proved His faithfulness once again!! I had VICTORY!!
My heart was filled with peace. And I quickly fell back asleep.
“In peace I will lie down and sleep, for You alone, O LORD, will keep me safe” Psalm 4:8 NLT
Thank You Lord for Your faithfulness. Thank You for Your goodness in midst of hardships. Thank You for the peace You give. Thank you for Your abundance of grace to endure until the end and not leave Ukraine before Your time.
And thank you for everyone who is praying for Ukraine and for me❤️
No salvation in the name Mohammad No salvation in the name of Buddha No salvation in being a church leader No salvation in being good and kind
No salvation in to church just going No salvation in a member be No salvation in all other names No salvation but the name of Christ
He’s above all names, above all names Only in Christ Jesus is salvation Only in repentance, faith in Him Only He alone is our salvation
“You’re offensive” you might tell me harshly “You’re intolerant, a bigot too” But no other person ever ever Perfect was and spilled His Blood for us
Only Jesus, He alone is Savior Only He can sin forgive completely Make us new, and cleanse us from our sin No salvation in no other name!
He alone is worthy of Your trust He is worthy of your worship, praise He is worthy to your life to lay Follow Him and worship Him and praise
(4/25/2020)
“Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved” Acts 4:12 KJV
“How shall we escape, if we neglect so great salvation; which at the first began to be spoken by the Lord, and was confirmed unto us by them that heard him” Hebrews 2:3 KJV
